Hey there, Cowboys fans (and maybe some sneaky rivals looking for a laugh)! Whether you’re celebrating a big win or nursing your wounds after a nail-biting loss, one thing’s for sure: nothing beats a good laugh to lift your spirits. That’s where we come in! We’ve rounded up 101 Dallas Cowboys jokes that are guaranteed to put a smile on your face, no matter what the scoreboard says. So grab your foam finger, sit back, and get ready to chuckle through some Cowboys comedy gold—because even when the game’s tough, the jokes should be easy!
101 Dallas Cowboys Jokes That Will Have You Cheering and Chuckling
- Why do the Cowboys always get so much publicity? Because it’s America’s almost team.
- Why did the Cowboys hire a personal trainer? To learn how to “carry” a lead.
- Why did the Cowboys bring a ladder to practice? To get on a higher level!
- What do the Cowboys and a dollar bill have in common? They both get folded every Sunday.
- Why don’t Cowboys players eat cereal? The bowl keeps getting stolen.
- Why did the Cowboys go to art school? To work on their “finishing” touches.
- Why do Cowboys fans have a tough time getting through airport security? Too much baggage.
- Why did the Cowboy refuse the job offer? He couldn’t handle the “end” zone.
- What’s the Cowboys’ favorite horror movie? The Playoff Disappearance.
- How do Cowboys fans change a light bulb? They wait for the replay.
Laugh Your Way Through 101 Hilarious Dallas Cowboys Jokes Coaching and Strategy
- Why did the Cowboys change their coach? They needed a “new drive.”
- What’s the Cowboys’ strategy for winning games? They’re still working on it!
- How do you know when the Cowboys’ coach is nervous? He starts watching his watch.
- Why don’t the Cowboys use their GPS? They always lose direction at the playoffs.
- Why did the Cowboys coach get a timeout? He ran out of new plays.
- How did the Cowboys’ coach break his calculator? He kept trying to add up wins.
- How many Cowboys coaches does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one—but it’s a five-year process.
- Why does the Cowboys’ playbook have a map? To help them find the end zone.
- Why does the Cowboys’ coach carry an umbrella? In case of another “hail Mary” storm.
- Why don’t Cowboys coaches play poker? They’re always bluffing the fans.
101 Dallas Cowboys Defense Jokes Guaranteed to Score Laughs
- How did the Cowboys’ defense get its name? They’re “defenseless.”
- Why do Cowboys defenders make bad lawyers? They always “miss the case.”
- Why does the Cowboys’ defense wear sneakers? For extra “slip.”
- What’s the Cowboys’ defense’s favorite music genre? Soft rock.
- Why did the Cowboys defense stop at the bakery? They heard they needed “turnovers.”
- Why did the Cowboys defensive line get invited to the party? To let everyone else through!
- What’s the Cowboys’ defense’s favorite TV show? Are You Afraid of the Dark?
- Why does the Cowboys defense love elevators? They keep bringing them down.
- How does the Cowboys defense greet opposing quarterbacks? “After you, sir!”
- Why doesn’t the Cowboys defense practice in the off-season? They want to keep their skills untouched.
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101 Dallas Cowboys Offense Jokes to Make You Grin
- Why did the Cowboys quarterback break up with his GPS? It couldn’t find the end zone.
- Why don’t Cowboys’ offensive plays go to college? They never score!
- Why does the Cowboys offense love camping? They’re used to “pitching tents.”
- Why don’t the Cowboys practice their passes? Because incomplete is their specialty.
- Why did the Cowboys offense fail math? They couldn’t count to 10 yards.
- Why does the Cowboys quarterback love his phone? It never drops a call.
- What’s the Cowboys offense’s favorite coffee? The “decaf” offense!
- Why does the Cowboys offense love riddles? They’re always “lost” in the answers.
- Why did the Cowboys offense visit a therapist? They needed help finding their “drive.”
- Why don’t Cowboys offensive linemen ever cook? They always get “burned.”
101 Dallas Cowboys Jokes That Will Tackle Your Funny Bone with Rivalry & NFL Comparisons
- What do the Cowboys and a broken clock have in common? They’re only right twice a season.
- How do you make a Cowboys fan depressed? Remind them of the 90s.
- Why don’t Cowboys fans argue with Eagles fans? They know better than to pick a losing battle.
- Why did the Cowboys fan break up with his girlfriend? She reminded him of the team: couldn’t commit.
- Why do Cowboys fans never get dates? Their pickup lines are all “Hail Marys.”
- Why do the Cowboys make for great party guests? They don’t stay too long in the playoffs.
- How do Cowboys fans know when to leave the stadium? When the winning team shows up.
- Why do Texans fans and Cowboys fans get along? They both love watching football… just not each other’s teams.
- Why do Cowboys and Jets fans get along so well? They bond over disappointment.
- Why don’t Cowboys fans ever retire? They’re already used to not working in the playoffs.
From End Zone to LOL Zone: 101 Dallas Cowboys Star & Logo Jokes
- Why does the Cowboys logo have only one star? One star is all they can handle.
- Why is the Cowboys star always on the helmet? It’s only for show.
- Why did the Cowboys star get smaller? Because they’re “downsizing.”
- Why did the Cowboys change their star logo to a question mark? Their season’s always up in the air.
- Why does the Cowboys star have five points? Because that’s as close as they’ll get to a ring.
- Why don’t the Cowboys’ star shine brighter? It’s dimmed by the playoffs.
- Why is the Cowboys star like a black hole? It just sucks in hope.
- Why don’t the Cowboys logo and “victory” mix? Because they’re “opposites.”
- Why is the Cowboys star actually a fan? Because it only goes in circles.
- Why did the Cowboys logo star start wearing sunglasses? Too embarrassed to be seen.
Score Big Laughs with 101 Dallas Cowboys Quarterback Jokes
- Why did the Cowboys’ QB bring a dictionary to practice? To look up “completion.”
- What’s a Cowboys quarterback’s worst fear? A 10-yard completion.
- Why did the Cowboys QB become a chef? He was used to “tossing things.”
- Why don’t Cowboys quarterbacks do stand-up comedy? They hate “delivery.”
- Why don’t Cowboys QBs play in the NBA? Because they can’t “make the pass.”
- Why did the Cowboys QB go to clown school? To work on his “juggling.”
- Why don’t Cowboys QBs swim? They’re afraid of deep throws.
- Why don’t Cowboys quarterbacks keep pets? They can’t handle “dropping” them.
- Why is the Cowboys QB always sleepy? Because he’s tired of “passing out.”
- Why did the Cowboys QB get fired from his job at the bakery? He couldn’t handle the “rolls.”
The Ultimate List of 101 Dallas Cowboys Themed and Miscellaneous jokes
- Why do Cowboys fans bring ladders to the game? To reach their expectations.
- Why do Cowboys fans love the desert? No expectations, just sand.
- Why do Cowboys players make bad detectives? They lose every case.
- Why did the Cowboys get a new mascot? Their old one left for a winning team.
- Why does the Cowboys team love Halloween? Their best plays are “ghosted.”
- Why don’t the Cowboys play hide and seek? They always get lost.
- Why do Cowboys players love puzzles? They’re used to “falling apart.”
- Why don’t the Cowboys make sequels? They never finish the first act.
- Why did the Cowboys bring tissues to the game? In case they “blow it.”
- Why did the Cowboys team get a dog? To finally win something.
101 Dallas Cowboys Jokes That Hit Harder Than a Linebacker Stadium & Game Day
- Why did Cowboys fans bring maps? They’re lost in the past.
- Why do Cowboys fans love baseball season? It’s a break from disappointment.
- Why does the Cowboys’ field have high walls? To keep their hopes grounded.
- Why did the Cowboys team make an app? To help find the playoffs.
- Why don’t the Cowboys use scissors? They’re afraid of “cutting ties.”
- Why do Cowboys fans bring calculators? To keep track of losses.
- Why did the Cowboys change their uniforms? To blend in with the grass.
- Why does the Cowboys’ stadium have so many exits? To let down all the fans at once.
- Why did the Cowboys coach buy a telescope? To look at past victories.
- Why did the Cowboys put wheels on their stadium? To roll with the losses.
Game On! 101 Dallas Cowboys Jokes You’ll LoveCowboys History
- What’s a Cowboys fan’s favorite book? The Glory Days.
- Why don’t Cowboys fans go to history class? They’re tired of the 90s.
- Why do Cowboys fans carry dictionaries? They’re looking up “win.”
- Why did the Cowboys’ history book disappear? It was taken by the 90s.
- Why do Cowboys fans take selfies? So they have recent memories.
- Why don’t Cowboys fans check Twitter? They’re tired of the “throwbacks.”
- Why did the Cowboys turn to history? To see their last win.
- Why do Cowboys players study history? For when they actually made it.
- Why do Cowboys fans bring old photos to games? They’re just nostalgic.
- Why did the Cowboys write a song? To relive the past glory.
101 Dallas Cowboys Jokes to Kick Off Your Comedy Game Day Superstitions
- Why did the Cowboys fans wear mismatched socks? It’s a good luck thing. It hasn’t worked yet.
- Why do Cowboys fans knock on wood? To “knock out” bad plays.
- Why did Cowboys fans start carrying rabbit’s feet? They need all the help they can get.
- Why don’t Cowboys fans sit during games? They want to “stand up” to disappointment.
- Why do Cowboys fans toss salt over their shoulders? Because their season’s usually a slug-fest.
- Why do Cowboys fans avoid black cats? They bring enough bad luck on their own.
- Why do Cowboys fans carry four-leaf clovers? They think it’s the “missing link.”
- Why do Cowboys fans avoid walking under ladders? To dodge more bad luck.
- Why did Cowboys fans start carrying horseshoes? Their usual luck isn’t cutting it.
- Why do Cowboys fans hold their breath during games? To avoid breathing in more disappointment.
Need a Laugh? Here Are 101 Dallas Cowboys Jokes Just for You Closing Out with “Hope”
- Why don’t Cowboys fans carry dictionaries? Hope isn’t in their vocabulary.
- Why do Cowboys fans bring candles to games? For the “dim” light of hope.
- Why don’t Cowboys fans watch the clock? Hope springs eternal… until it doesn’t.
- Why do Cowboys fans bring umbrellas? In case of another “Hail Mary.”
- Why do Cowboys fans watch old games? That’s where their “hope” is.
- Why did the Cowboys plant a tree? They’re “rooted” in hope.
- Why do Cowboys fans love the sunrise? It reminds them of brighter days.
- Why don’t Cowboys fans throw in the towel? Because hope is stubborn.
- Why do Cowboys fans always come back? Because hope springs eternal.
- Why do Cowboys fans keep watching? They’re hopeful for… next season.
Need a Laugh? Here Are 101 Dallas Cowboys Jokes Just for You
Well, folks, that’s the final whistle on our 101 Dallas Cowboys jokes. Hopefully, you’re feeling a bit lighter and a lot more amused. Whether you’re a die-hard Cowboys fan or just here for the laughs, we hope we’ve given you a few reasons to smile today. And remember, no matter what happens on the field, we can always come together over a good joke. Until next time, keep laughing and, as always, go Cowboys! Or, you know, just keep joking about them.