101 Library Jokes To make you smile
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Welcome to the only book in the library that doesn’t mind being laughed at!
You’ve just checked out a collection of 101 library jokes guaranteed to brighten your bookshelf and tickle your funny bone — all without triggering the wrath of a stern librarian (we hope).

Inside, you’ll find clever puns, shelf-ish humor, and literary one-liners that even Shakespeare would giggle at in iambic pentameter. So get cozy, flip the page, and let’s turn overdue laughs into right-on-time joy.

Remember: whisper your giggles… or just pretend you’re sneezing repeatedly.

Bookmark This: 101 Library Jokes That'll Crack You Up

Bookmark This: 101 Library Jokes That’ll Crack You Up

  1. Why did the library book go to therapy?
    It had too many issues.
  2. I tried to start a fight in the library…
    But I couldn’t get past the prologue.
  3. The library’s new self-help section is just one mirror.
    Budget cuts are getting real.
  4. Why don’t libraries have dating sections?
    Because people keep returning each other.
  5. What’s a librarian’s favorite kind of music?
    Shhh-mooth jazz.
  6. I got kicked out of the library for putting The Hunger Games in the cookbooks section.
    Seemed fair.
  7. Why was the book always cold?
    It was full of chilling plots.
  8. What’s a vampire’s favorite section in the library?
    The crypt-ology aisle.
  9. I tried to organize a hide-and-seek tournament in the library…
    But good luck finding anyone.
  10. Why are libraries the best place to find yourself?
    Because you’re on every page of a self-help book.
  11. The romance section had a power outage…
    Now it’s just a dark tale.

101 Library Jokes That Deserve a Standing Whisper

  1. What’s a pirate’s favorite thing about the library?
    The arrrrr-chives.
  2. Why did the book cross the road?
    It needed to get back to its shelf.
  3. Why don’t libraries play music?
    Because they already have too many notes.
  4. I tried writing a book on reverse psychology.
    Please don’t read it.
  5. Why don’t libraries serve alcohol?
    Too many people can’t handle their literature.
  6. What’s the most action-packed section of the library?
    The overdue books list.
  7. The librarian told me my joke was too long.
    So I abridged it.
  8. Why are ghosts banned from libraries?
    They keep making things go boo-ring.
  9. I asked if they had any books on minimalism.
    The librarian handed me a blank sheet.
  10. The horror section gave me goosebumps.
    And paper cuts.
101 Library Jokes for the Literate Laugher

101 Library Jokes for the Literate Laugher

  1. Why did the book get arrested?
    It had a suspenseful history.
  2. Why did the library install speed bumps?
    Too many readers speeding through the plot.
  3. I checked out a book on anti-gravity.
    I couldn’t put it down.
  4. Why was the math book sad in the library?
    Too many problems, not enough solutions.
  5. What’s a librarian’s least favorite letter?
    Overdue F.
  6. What did the librarian wear to the beach?
    Bookini.
  7. What’s a cat’s favorite part of the library?
    The purr-iodicals.
  8. Why did the novel get a job?
    It wanted to be more than just fiction.
  9. The library opened a bakery section.
    Now we’ve got breadcrumb trails in the aisles.
  10. I told my friend a joke in the library.
    We laughed in subtext.
  11. Why did the comic book stay quiet?
    It was under cover.
Punchlines & PHDs: Humor Academy Goes 2.0

Punchlines & PHDs: Humor Academy Goes 2.0

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Between the Laughs: 101 Hilarious Library Moments

  1. I tried to write a joke about libraries…
    But I kept getting booked.
  2. What did the librarian say to the magician?
    “Pick a card, any reference.”
  3. Why don’t libraries ever get robbed?
    Because everyone’s booked solid.
  4. Why did the book sit in the corner?
    It needed some space.
  5. What’s a library’s favorite game?
    Hide and read.
  6. I asked for a book on commitment.
    But I couldn’t finish it.
  7. Why are libraries so calm?
    They’ve mastered serene-ography.
  8. What do you get when you read in the shower?
    A soggy plot twist.
  9. Why don’t libraries have GPS?
    Because you can’t lose your place.
  10. What did the book do at the gym?
    Got a little more binding.
Laugh Out Loud in the Library Just Don’t Get Caught 101 Jokes

Laugh Out Loud in the Library (Just Don’t Get Caught): 101 Jokes

  1. I joined a library dating site.
    I met “Cliff Notes.” He’s short, but informative.
  2. What did one overdue book say to the other?
    “We’re in the same chapter of life.”
  3. Why did the library hire a DJ?
    For silent disco night.
  4. What’s a ghost’s favorite book genre?
    Anything with a dead plot.
  5. The library had a sale on bookmarks.
    It was a real page-turner.
  6. I read a mystery in the dark.
    Still couldn’t see the ending coming.
  7. I asked if they had books on claustrophobia.
    She said, “Yes, but they’re on the bottom shelf in a locked cabinet.”
  8. What did the librarian say to the detective?
    “Shhh… I’m on the case too.”
  9. Why did the dictionary go to school?
    To improve its definition.
  10. I got fined for talking in the library.
    Worth it. My joke was killer.
  11. What’s a librarian’s favorite pickup line?
    “You’ve got fine written all over you.”

101 Jokes Only Librarians and Bookworms Will Get

  1. Why did the author get a library card?
    To check himself out.
  2. I got lost in the library.
    Took me hours to chapter my way out.
  3. Why are libraries so dramatic?
    Every shelf is full of stories.
  4. What do you call a librarian in space?
    A stargazer with Dewey decimals.
  5. Why did the kid eat his library book?
    He wanted to devour knowledge.
  6. I tried to write a book about silence.
    But I couldn’t get a word in.
  7. What do librarians eat for lunch?
    Dewey sandwiches.
  8. What’s a book’s favorite friend?
    A shelf mate.
  9. Why do books never gossip?
    They mind their own chapter.
Library Laughs for Students: 101 Reasons to Love the Stacks

Library Laughs for Students: 101 Reasons to Love the Stacks

  1. Why did the librarian get promoted?
    She knew how to shelve her problems.
  2. I wrote a book on procrastination.
    I’ll publish it later.
  3. The librarian started lifting weights.
    She’s now stacked in every sense.
  4. Why are libraries great at social distancing?
    They’ve always practiced quiet separation.
  5. I met my soulmate in the library.
    We both reached for the same pun book.
  6. I took a nap in the nonfiction section.
    Now I dream factually.
  7. Why did the librarian break up with the bookshelf?
    It was too clingy.
  8. I asked for a suspense book.
    The librarian said, “Wait right here…”
  9. The poetry section is overflowing.
    It’s a real rhyme problem.
  10. What do you call an organized bookshelf?
    A novel idea.
  11. What happens when you read too much?
    You book out of reality.

Library Laughs for Students: 101 Reasons to Love the Stacks

  1. I challenged the librarian to a debate.
    She referenced every argument.
  2. I asked for a book on sarcasm.
    She gave me an empty box.
  3. Why did the book file a complaint?
    It didn’t like being judged by its cover.
  4. What’s a librarian’s favorite board game?
    Guess Who’s Late Again?
  5. I joined a silent book club.
    We just stare at each other and nod.
  6. What do libraries and relationships have in common?
    They both require commitment issues.
  7. I told my friend to get lost…
    In a good book.
  8. What do you call a clumsy librarian?
    A walking footnote.
  9. Why did the librarian wear glasses?
    To improve her shelf-awareness.
  10. I saw a book flirting with a magazine.
    Total cover attraction.
  11. Why are libraries bad at gossip?
    Everything’s classified.
101 Library Jokes for Readers, Researchers

101 Library Jokes for Readers, Researchers & Rebels

  1. I donated a joke book to the library.
    Now it’s in the humor archives.
  2. The history section had an argument.
    It’s all in the past now.
  3. Why did the audiobook get dumped?
    It kept repeating itself.
  4. I told the librarian I loved books.
    She said, “That’s a novel concept.”
  5. What do you call a stressed-out librarian?
    A wreck-tangle.
  6. The library’s haunted…
    Too many unfinished chapters.
  7. What do books use to keep warm?
    Book jackets.
  8. Why don’t authors ever win races?
    Too many drafts.
  9. I asked Siri for a good library joke.
    She said, “Why not just ask a librarian?”
  10. What’s a library’s favorite type of humor?
    Dry wit and paper cuts.
  11. Why was the library book always tired?
    It never got a rest period.

Funny Fiction: 101 Library Jokes for the Quietly Hilarious

  1. The librarian moonlights as a ninja.
    Silent. Deadly. Accurate.
  2. What’s a librarian’s battle cry?
    “To the stacks!”
  3. Why did the library computer crash?
    Too many tabs open—just like my life.
  4. The librarian wrote a rap album.
    It’s called Straight Outta Dewey.
  5. What do you call it when a book gets famous?
    A best-shelfer.
  6. Why did the book go to art school?
    It wanted better cover design.
  7. I spilled coffee on a library book.
    It’s a mug-shot now.
Funny Fiction: 101 Library Jokes for the Quietly Hilarious

Funny Fiction: 101 Library Jokes for the Quietly Hilarious

  1. The fantasy section got a new addition.
    A book on realistic dragons.
  2. I met a philosopher in the library.
    Now I question everything—even this joke.
  3. What do you get when you mix a librarian and a comedian?
    A pun-ctual genius.
  4. Why did the librarian blush?
    Too many rom-coms.
  5. What’s the hardest part about working at the library?
    Every ending is spoiled eventually.
  6. My favorite shelf in the library?
    The one that holds up over time.
  7. I made a playlist for the library.
    It’s 100% silent.
  8. Why did the library open a gym?
    To help patrons get booked up.
Get Lit-erary: 101 Jokes Straight Outta the Library

Get Lit-erary: 101 Jokes Straight Outta the Library

Well done, brave reader! You’ve made it through 101 jokes without getting shushed too hard — that’s an achievement worthy of its own library card upgrade.

We hope this little comedy catalog brought you joy, giggles, and just the right amount of groan-worthy puns to share (or inflict) on your fellow bookworms.

Remember: laughter is contagious, and so is a good pun. Spread both generously — preferably in the fiction section where things are already made up anyway.

Until next time… keep calm and keep giggling in the stacks.

We make bad days better—one punchline at a time.